8 Questions for Self-Reflection (Printable)

A few weeks back on Instagram stories, I shared a series of questions that I work through whenever I am struggling with something that I want to understand and change. I use these 8 questions if I desire to change after a particularly convicting Scripture reading, or when I notice a recurring sin or unloving thought pattern in my own life like impatience, frustration, or negative thoughts, or when I feel a sudden (surprising) emotion and I’m not sure why.

I was surprised by how many messages I received by people telling me that the questions were so helpful and asking me to make a printout of them, and to elaborate on them. My friend, Lisa, prompted me to elaborate on them and without her godly encouragement, well, you know me. 😉 So, here I am, after the holidays, staying true to my word that I’d share more.

If you’d like to print the printable, it’s here—-> 8 Questions.

Here’s how I think through them.

1. What hurts right now? What is tender? Where do I feel loss/fear/insufficient/misunderstood/resentment/dissatisfaction? Identifying what is causing you pain is often half the battle. I feel________ (hurt, lonely, overlooked, misunderstood, unlike) Or I desire _______(a husband, children, more money, respect, a particular ministry, peace and quiet, a home, etc….Sometimes I don’t even know what’s wrong–until I experience the negative emotion in the face of lack or perceived lack. Emotions are like “warning lights” that tell me something is up inside. I’m responsible for my actions and reactions, not my initial emotional indicators. When I feel fear or anger unexpectedly, I am responsible to make sure that I respond in a godly way. This is when this chart comes in handy. It helps me to stop, think, and evaluate so I can think about what is triggering that emotion. Then I can get to the root of my belief so I can love God with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.
2. What have I done with this hurt or emptiness? Usually we emote or suppress, over speak or over eat, we manipulate to try to take control, or we give in to self pity.
3. If my desire was a good desire, how is this lack/loss/waiting good for me? “All things work together for good”…do I believe this? God does not withhold good things from His children, so if I don’t have what I desire, it’s not good for me right now. He wants to give me something better…and usually that’s knowing Him and learning to rely on Him more heavily.
4. What am I learning in my waiting? How is God using this trial to better me? What sins are surfacing? What wrong assumptions about God am I believing?
5. In my waiting, do I believe God is who He says He is? *Do I believe God will do what He says He will do? *Do I trust His promises?* Do I know God? These are core questions, because often times we have ideas about God that are anti-Biblical (“He owes me because I serve Him.” “God wouldn’t allow this kind of suffering if He loves me.” “God wants me to be happy.” “God must be punishing me.” “God must be mad at me.””If I only had this thing, I could serve God better.” ) Or we are on board with God because we think we may benefit in ways He’s never promised?
6. Am I truly worshipping today through this trial? If not, how long has it been since I’ve truly worshipped? Am I going through the motions without heart? Am I loving God with all my heart, soul, and mind?
7. If not, what has captured my worship and captivated my gaze? What am I chasing? What is ruling me right now that needs to be repented of?
8. How can this loss/lack/hurt bring me back to a place of right worship today? Am I willing to trust God in the middle of unwanted and unplanned for events in life?  If not, go back to #5 and dig deeper.

I love this quote from Sally Clarkson’s  Own Your Life that has helped me so many times.

“Each of us has a different life puzzle to assemble. The choices you make in the midst of your life journey do have eternal consequences. Yes, you can throw the pieces at God in anger and say, “I do not like the life You have given me, and I refuse to live within these limitations with a humble heart. You have made me a victim. You have ruined my life. I will choose to live in darkness.” If that is your choice, the puzzle of your life will remain fragmented and separated, with holes in the picture. However, if you choose to bow your knee and submit to the varied circumstances of your life, God will do miracles. If you choose to trust and develop your integrity and an inner standard of holiness that isn’t dependent on cultural standards, the puzzle pieces will begin to come together. No matter what your limitations are—health issues, financial problems, a difficult marriage or divorce, a loss of friendship, death of a dream—your life is meant to be filled to the brim with the potential of God’s blessings. But in order to thrive and heal, you must accept any limitations by faith, trust in His faithfulness each step of the way, and wait for His grace so you can live a faithful story right in the place you find yourself.”

I hope these help you!!

*This post contains affiliate links at no cost to you. Thanks for supporting JoyFilledDays.com