Our Words Are Not Our Own.
Word, words, words.
They can be oh so lovely, or devastatingly unrecoverable.
We communicate with what we say and don’t say; write and don’t write.
We can communicate disdain with a sideglance.
Our kids know our “don’t you dare” mom-glare.
We can communicate absolute adoration for a newborn baby (or a new Joanna Gaines tablescape) with one look of delight.
And sometimes what was never said rings loudly in the mind of the adult child who never heard the words I love you from a parent his entire childhood.
Why do our words matter?
Well, as women of purpose who have been bought by the precious blood of Jesus Christ, our words are no longer our own. Our words and hearts have been remade and are under the authority of God’s will. We answer to our Master for every idle word. (Also, it has been said that the tongue is the microphone of the heart. It “tells” on our thought life. That’s why our thought life matters!)
Our words should be only for the praise and pleasure of Christ.
As Kingdom Women who know what is at stake,
who know the transforming power of the gospel to save,
who are not our own, but are bought with a price,
our words must have a purpose: to speak loving truth, to agree with Scripture, to edify others, to restore in meekness a wandering brother, to encourage and point others to Christ.
Oh, I know this isn’t popular.
It’s a far cry from what you’ll read in the magazines and self-help books of this world. We’re told that words are a weapon for self-protection, self-expression, self-realization, self-aggrandizement.
“Find your voice.” “Speak your truth.” “Be brave.” “Tell it like it is, even if your voice is shaking.”
Reactionary speech is considered courageous– almost virtuous– so long as it’s heartfelt or authentic.
This is not brave or strong.
It takes zero character to tell someone off, accuse, destroy, defame, gossip, or tear into another person. Satan’s been doing that from the beginning and he loves the company.
But what about when we are speaking out on someone else’s behalf? Standing up to injustice? Can’t we let it all out then?
I fear we have blind spots there, too.
Even speaking the truth where injustice is involved is not necessarily about *destroying* the person that has done the injustice. Truth coming to light is the end goal so that the powers that be can fairly dole out justice. Vengeance on the wrong-doers is not our job, so we should soul-search if we find joy in seeing another person destroyed on their way to judgment.
God will repay (usually by the law and state) and when we know the magnitude of our own sin, we should find room in our hearts to hope for mercy for even the worst offender among us. There’s room at the cross for their offense, too.
OK. This is the point where I’m going to step on all of our toes. I’m sorry in advance.
Even Christian women excuse away our careless speech as hormonal. Yes, we do.
Am I right?
Oh, it was that time of the month. We’re so soft with our sin, aren’t we?
“I was just out of sorts. “
“I am really passionate about this.”
“I’m sorry, but….I’m hangry.””I was just trying to be helpful.”
“I don’t know why I said that.”
“I don’t know where that came from. I just blurted it out.”
True story: We’d be a lot more honest if we’d just admit that we are extra-sinful in that time of the month.
(Tip: when the world around you feels stupid between days 14-28 of your cycle, SAY NOTHING. Write down your awesome ideas. Pray about what’s troubling you. But don’t verbalize it to the person who is driving you crazy. Distract yourself. Go out for a coffee. Meet up with a friend. Take a walk, but don’t spill your guts. You’ll be so much happier and have to ask forgiveness a whole lot less if you use self-control during these up and down times. God will give you the grace and the victory over corrupt communication! But YOU have to partner with him. Someone has said that maybe we should try superglue instead of Chapstick during these times? Hmmm. LOL)
On the off chance that you do mess up, verbalizing the truth might keep us from quickly doing it again: “Honey, I apologize for being extra sinful with my words this morning. Will you forgive me?”
That might slow down the letting off steam a few PSI (Pound per square inch. LOL) AmIRight?
But the question is always this:
- Does God want you to say that?
- Do these words put me at variance with God’s Word?
- Were your words under the Lordship of Christ?
- Were you Spirit-led?
- Did your attitude represent God’s character?
A Scriptural Mirror to examine our words:
When we share something on social media, does our “wisdom” contradict God’s Word? “Speak thou the things which become sound doctrine…”
When we speak to someone in “private”, do we show God’s sovereignty in our lives? “Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.”
Do our words communicate the love of others, or do we show paranoia, unkind assumptions, or negative assignations? “Death and life are in the power of the tongue..” “The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.”
Do our words destroy a person, or are they restorative? Are we attacking them or trying to persuade them to turn again into the right path? “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”
Are our words appropriately spoken in the right time and manner? Am I the right person to be speaking into this person’s life? Am I trying to be the Holy Spirit in someone elses life?
“Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”
When we communicate, is God glorified? Are people restored? Is truth lovingly spoken? Or are people put in their place or injured as we vent and get things off our chest? “A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.”“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
If you want to know the current condition of your Christian walk, look no further than your thoughts and words. May our words properly reflect the goodness of our Savior and make much of Christ!
Sarah, this spoke to my heart this morning…it’s something that’s been on my mind for quite a while. Could you tell me where this verse is found? It needs to be on my refrigerator , that’s my “reminder” spot. “Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.”
It’s Psalm 19:14. It’s quite convicting, isn’t it?
What a great reminder that we speak for Christ as we open our mouth. One of my favorite books on this topic is Florence Littauer’s “Silver Boxes” (I have read it several times.) Blessings and thanks to you, Sarah!
Ooo, I’ve not read that book. I’ll look it up!! Thank you!