Raising kids. Keeping House. Choosing joy, every day.

The Good Child Idol

Christian mothers, are you aiming too low for your children?

Are you content to settle for “My kids turned out good” instead of aiming for something higher—true godliness.

And what do you mean when you say that someone’s kids turned out well?

Too often, we are more content with external moralism than anything else. The child looks good on the outside and yes,conforms. But inside they are sneaky, angry, devoid of any real love for God–and ya know what? As long as nobody else sees that and criticizes our parenting, too often we are okay with that.We’d rather hide behind our own little facades than to weep for our children’s lack of love for our God, or their rebellious hearts.

The perfect family image has become god to many Christians.

Our own reputation and the reputation of our child has become our god. Truth be told, most conservative parents would be afraid to let their children out of their sight for fear that they’d make a huge mistake–one that would get talked about, or was irreversible. Their grief is more about their own shame and pride in parenting than it is about their child offending a thrice holy God.

Before you are content to think that your child turned out good, define your terms.

There is only one good–and that is God. Any attempt to bolster your own goodness in the eyes of others is pride. You are not good. The Bible makes that oh, so very clear.

A child that is turning out “good” is one that:

  • desires God and is troubled when they don’t.
  • honors God with their lips, actions and heart and is grieved when they don’t.
  • humbly serves others without being “sat” on to do so.
  • seeks a right relationship with others based on the truth of scripture.
  • seeks forgiveness from God and others when they haven’t done right.
Don’t make it easy on your child to be a hypocrite, and don’t model this behavior yourself. If we value “looks” over “truth” then there is something seriously wrong with our parenting–stemming from something seriously wrong with our own divided hearts.
Pray for clarity and wisdom in your parenting!