Tag Archive for fear

Facing Worry and Breaking the Cycle

The last three weeks feel like the rug of life has been pulled out from under us. We’ve had our share of trials to say the least. We are still waiting for things to right themselves.

We’ve experienced run of the mill trials, we’ve hurt with friends who’ve had life altering trials, we’ve experienced our own heart aches, and we’ve seen God orchestrating our lives in an unexpected manner.

God has brought a situations into our lives out of the blue and we are anticipating the outcome. All we can do is wait and try not to freak out. The Lord seems to be placing an opportunity into our laps that we’d never considered or sought. The situation is so overwhelming that I had no appetite for a week. (I lost 3 lbs.)

Then I realize that my old friend fear has surfaced.

 

Worry has a way of making me feel at home and productive in a deceptive way  and choosing faith is one of those basics of the Christian life that I find I am having to go back and address all over again.

I was recently asked to write an article for Trillia Newbell’s new book launch Fear and Faith: Finding the Peace Your Heart Craves (available April 1st!).  I recounted the many fears I had as a new mother. I felt like a crazy lady submitting it because writing down irrational fears and submitting it for the world to read is terrifying and humbling, and in hindsight, I think fear was the controlling motivator in my life FOR YEARS.

But writing the article had two other benefits. I saw the grace of God, from where I used to be to what He’s done in my life to date. But it was also a rebuke to myself for today, because I realized that old habits die hard and though I’ve made progress over the 22 years I’ve been a mom in the “worry department”, fighting for faith is a life long pursuit. Isn’t God so patient and kind with us?

One thing that has helped me over the years is reading the Psalms. I’ve always noticed “patterns” and reading David helped me see his thought patterns and helped me get a grip on my own worry.

When you read the Psalms you notice that David::

  • gets his eyes off the Lord and onto problems>>
  • which leads him to fear, despair, hide, complain, compare>>
  • and then he remembers God and his faithfulness and covenants (read:: meditates on the right things)> >
  • and then David rejoices and hopes.

I’m preaching to my own heart a lot lately in the midst of all this uncertainty about where I’ve set my gaze. And the Lord was so good to me to send me Trillia’s book free of charge to encourage me to keep trusting Him.

Worry needs to be faced head on, friends. It’s not something to toy with or ignore. It can’t grow unchallenged deep in the recessed of your mind because it’s an assault on the goodness of God. At its core, it’s unbelief. Unbelief!

It’s doubt. It’s a control issue. It’s all bad things–really bad things–and it’s an assault on our faith from within ourselves that needs to be challenged.

Sometimes to live a life of faith, you have to do battle with your own mind. You realign your rogue thoughts. You take captive the God-offending, God-accusing junk of your own mind and call it what it is: unbelief. I’m not believing God’s word today. Sometimes admitting the problem is the first step to fixing it.

If I continue to focus on my problems, they GROW to larger than life. If I mediated on the FUTURE and don’t see God in the picture anywhere, fear freezes and paralyzes me. I’m living like God doesn’t exist when my thinking goes off like that.

It’s only as I set my hope in God and understand that

  • he leads
  • he protects
  • he knows
  • he sees
  • he ordains
  • he loves
  • he cares
  • he is there in my future

that I find confidence to drop the worry and run to Jesus for rest.

When I forget God, I’m pretty much relying on my own reserves which are piddly at best.

Today, my encouragement is for you to look away from your problems to your God who is bigger than any of them. Then “Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you.” And no backsies. If you find yourself worrying, give it back to the Lord again. He’s faithful and by faith, you can trust Him!

 

Fear, Faith and Following {Ministry Wives Monday Guest Post}

I’m so excited to have a guest post submitted by a missionary wife and friend, Michelle.

Michelle has served as an assistant pastor’s wife and is currently serving overseas with her husband on the mission field.  They have three children, ages 8, 7, and 3, with a fourth one coming in one month!  She enjoys reading, quilting, hiking, and watching baseball with her husband.  I hope her words of faith and fear-less-ness encourage you as much as they did me!

michelle

Fear, Faith, and Following

“I’m afraid, Mommy!”  is a common phrase spoken by my children.  Whether it is a wild animal, a bug, a scary movie, or just doing a new activity, my children voice their fear to me almost every day.  Each time my children express this feeling, I try to address their fear right away, and to use that moment to teach them to trust or depend on God even in little situations. Most of us as adults still struggle with responding in fear rather than in faith.  We further complicate matters by getting married to another sinful human being.   If our husband is in ministry, we face even more fearful challenges due to the uncertainty of ministry. As ministry wives, if we do not respond in faith to God while following our husbands, the end result can be devastating.  A fearful ministry wife can become discouraged and depressed, and if she does not turn to the Lord, she will ultimately destroy (or at the very least cripple) her husband’s ministry. So, how do we as ministry wives deal with fear as we follow our husbands to what God wants him to do?  1 Timothy 1:7 gives us three ways to fight fear with faith in our lives. It says “For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

First, notice that the verse says that GOD has not given us the spirit of fear, but rather GOD has given us three things instead.  Responding the right way to your husband’s leadership starts with your relationship with God.  Do you rely more on a human relationship for direction or guidance than you do on God and His Word?  If you have been married any length of time you know that your husband, no matter how godly he is, will not always be perfect, but God is omniscient, omnipresent, and all powerful!  He never makes a mistake or fails.  A great way to deal with fear is to start making a list of all the attributes of God, and to stop making a list of all the ways your husband can fail!

Secondly, God has given us the Holy Spirit that lives inside of us as believers. His Holy Spirit gives us power to defeat the fear.  Fear is a debilitating emotion that either wants us to freeze or run away from the problem.  Neither of these responses is based on faith in God.  This is our flesh’s response when something happens that we cannot deal with in our own strength. In Ephesians 6:10-18, Paul says, “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might.”  He then goes on to tell us how to defeat the fiery darts of the devil. As a ministry wife don’t give into the fiery dart of fear.  Remember, that the Holy Spirit has given us the power to fight fear with faith in the promises of God.

Thirdly, notice, that God has also given us the Holy Spirit so we can respond in love! A spirit of fear will respond in anger, revenge, discontentment, gossip, and pride, but it will never respond in love.  As ministry wives, we need to let our husbands know that we love them.  Are you unsure of how a loving response looks?  I Corinthians 13:4-7 lists the characteristics of love. They include: kindness, humility, prudence, sacrifice, truthfulness, and patience.  A ministry wife that has these characteristics is walking in the Spirit and will have no room for fear in her life.

The last thing mentioned that the Holy Spirit gives us is a sound mind.  I think that this is the most practical when dealing with ministry and following the leadership of our husbands. As women, fear is usually a reactionary, emotional response to a person or situation.  This is the opposite of a sound mind.  A sound mind is one that is under control and is putting to practice Philippians 4:8.     I, personally, have found it very helpful to tell my husband (or others) “Let me think about it,” whenever I feel the overwhelming emotion of fear taking over my thoughts.  Then I will spend time trying to think about his ideas when I am rested, fed, and spiritually recharged. (Sometimes a difficult combination to achieve as a mother of small children!)

God desires that we be women of faith not of fear.  He has given us the Holy Spirit so we have the power, love, and sound mind to defeat fear in our lives.  Following our husbands as they follow God is not easy, but with a deeper faith in God, we can be ministry wives who support and encourage our husbands to become all that God has for them!