For whatever reason, Titus 2 mentoring brings a mix of emotions. Fear and insecurity, on the part of the older women, and frustration on the part of the younger women, who are wondering why all of the older women are MIA.
I received a lot of feedback on my article “Where Are The Titus 2 Women” and I am hoping to answer some of the questions that seem to be plaguing you.
So, several thoughts.
You are older than someone. Think of it in terms of young children. Your eight year old learns to tie their shoe and in turn teaches your five year old the same skill. They don’t know much but they teach what they know.
You don’t have to teach everything. Nobody expects you to be a walking Biblical encyclopedia or the next Martha Stewart. But you can teach them something. Whether it is to rely on Christ and point them to Him, or to teach them to pray. When you are going through hard times, just watching a Biblical response to trials and fear is the best lesson you can pass along. Domestically, you can teach whatever you are good at: baking, crafting, floral arranging, etc…
Teach them that God is sovereign over their life, even if it looks different than yours. I have two teenage daughters and I am training them that God is sovereign. I am not training them to be “mommys”, or to be a wife, although those things are important. There are no guarantees that they will marry, or be able to have children. Training them to this “lesser” goal is doing them a disservice. I am training them to do whatever God puts in their path for and to His glory and with the goal of furthering His Kingdom. I think it is short sighted to train with any other goal in mind, and that you could actually set your child up for disappointment by training for something that is not a guarantee in this life. When I wake up in the morning, before I climb out of bed, I pray and thank God that he is in control and welcome whatever He brings into my life this day, good or bad.
Teach them what scripture teaches, and no more. The best lesson you can teach your sister is to trust in God and to seek wisdom from Him on areas that are ”indifferent” in scripture. Teach her to balance her liberty in Christ with self denial. What you may be able to practice without indulging your flesh (keeping your flesh at bay/self denial), your younger sister may not be able to practice.
We cannot go beyond what Titus 2 teaches, and add our own rules. Scripture teaches that young women should to keep their homes, but it does not say by word or in example that they can never work outside the home. I have seen two opposite extremes of this view played out: on one hand to neglect your homes and to never care for it, and on the other hand to proclaim that women are “queens of their home” and that this is where they should always be.
We are to train them to be the best help that they can be to their husbands. Sometimes this involves working to help with finances, or working to help a husband get through seminary. It means that we care well for our family, as unto the Lord, like everything else we are to do in life, so that God’s word will not be evil spoken of. (Examples in scripture would be Ruth, Lydia and the Prov. 31 women.)
But for the most part, just being an encouragement and listening ear is a great place to start.
If you are lacking older Christian women, pray and then start by get advice from books. (see my Titus 2 resources)
If you are looking for a younger woman to encourage, begin by asking her to come to lunch or by offering to watch her children so she can get some errands done. Be helpful and start by building a relationship. God will bless your efforts to bless her!